Recently, I interviewed on BYU Radio’s Lisa Clark Show about handling conflict during quarantine. Please take a listen here and keep these six points in mind:
(1) More interaction means more opportunities for conflict, but also for connection (think twins).
(2) Don’t be surprised when you have a conflict, but rather assume it will happen and prepare for constructive ways to deal with it (i.e., set up family conversations, couple time, one-on-one time with each child to check-in about conflicts each person is experiencing).
(3) Setting up ground rules as a family helps, but some conflicts need to be parceled out (i.e., if two kids are constantly fighting with each other, handle those separately rather than turning it into a family conflict).
(4) When you’re in a conflict that you’re not ready to immediately handle, communicate that you’re not ready to communicate to resolve it (i.e., “I know this is really important to resolve, but I need to take a walk and think it through before we have that conversation.”).
(5) As humans we need both predictability and creativity, so make sure you have some stable routines, but allow room for yourself and others to adjust and express themselves in new and different ways.
(6) All of us may experience conflict related to competing internal needs. We each have the need to belong through social connection and need opportunities to express our authenticity and uniqueness. Keep those universal needs in mind while working through your own feelings of conflict or while seeking to help others who are struggling.
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